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Sometimes I talk about things like faith, motherhood, suffering, and fear at Carrots. And sometimes I tackle the REALLY important questions like which Fiddler on the Roof bachelor is the dreamiest. I honestly don’t know what made me realize that this was a super important issue, but it popped into my head the other day and I realized that picking between the Motel the tailor, Perchik the revolutionary, and Fyedka the bookish Russian was nigh impossible. But let’s give it our best shot:
Motel: The Boy Next Door
Occupation: Tailor
Religion: Jewish
Build: Tall and thin, “but not because I have no food. If you let me marry your daughter I promise she will not starve.”
Favorite Attire: “I can make my own clothes.”
Dream: “Owning my own sewing machine.”
Tattoos: None
Biggest fears: “Asking loud bearded men for their daughter’s hand in marriage. (Surpassed by the fear of the girl I love wedding an aged butcher.)”
What’s a typical Friday night like for you?: “After finishing my work I might try to have a talk with Tzeitel (and keep an eye on Yente the matchmaker). If I’m lucky, I’ll be invited to stay for the Sabbath meal (but only because I love staring into Tzeitel’s beautiful eyes across the table NOT because I’m hungry. I have enough food for myself AND Tzeitel. Cannot stress this enough.)”
How can you not love Motel? He’s so endearing and sweet. I love how he conquers his naturally gentle and non-confrontational spirit to fight for the woman he loves. You know that he will do everything in his power to care for and to make Tzeitel happy until his dying day. And if you can make it all the way through his Miracle of Miracles song with dry eyes: “...the one I thought could never be/ God has given you to me” then you’re a heartless monster. Choose this adorable, penniless tailor and you’ll be so happy you won’t know how miserable you are!
Perchik: The Revolutionary Intellectual
Occupation: Tutor (“Not a beggar. And remember, never trust an employer.”)
Religion: Jewish
Favorite Attire: “My Karl Marx t-shirt.”
Dream: “End the oppression of the working classes by having a socioeconomic order structured upon the common ownership of the means of production.”
Biggest fears: “Money. It’s the world’s curse.”
Most Awkward Moment: “That time I was exiled to Siberia for being a Bolshevik.”
The Thing That Most Annoys Me. “When people say they’re not interested in politics. I mean EVERYTHING’s political.”
Favorite activity: “Dancing! By the river with strong-minded women named Hodel, at weddings with strong-minded women named Hodel, you name it. People don’t peg me as a dancer because I’m kind of a serious guy, but it’s true. I guess I’m just a dancing fool.”
While Perchik couldn’t make a flowery speech to save his life (I mean, the man proposes by asking a “political question”) that doesn’t mean he can’t be romantic. Make him your date to a wedding and he might make a scene, but everyone will know how much he likes you. Don’t expect him to ask your father for his permission to wed you, but he doesn’t completely throw out tradition–he will ask for his blessing. Perchik admires wit in women and the ability for a girl to think for herself. He’s always willing to stand up for what he believes to be right, despite what it will cost him. You might have to travel far from the home you love to be with him, but he’s certainly a catch.
Fyedya: The Bookish Russian
Occupation: Unclear, but involves a hoe. Is he a farmer? Is he a soldier? Depends on who you ask.
Religion: Russian Orthodox Christian
Personality: My friend’s describe me as, “a pleasant fellow, charming, honest, ambitious, quite bright, and very modest. Also, kind of a babe.”
Dream: “Meeting a bookish girl and raising many bookish children together.”
Tattoos: None
Biggest fears: “That’s an easy one. Running out of books! I mean, can you imagine?”
What’s a typical Friday night like for you?: “After the bookshop closes, I might try to save any bookish maidens from unruly cads before lending one of my favorite books to her.”
Fyedka is the sort of guy girls think is worth being shunned by your family and leaving your religion for. You’re sure to be the talk of the village if you’re seen with Fyedka. Chivalrous, bookish, and willing to leave his town to protest injustice, it’s hard to beat this Russian dreamboat. But one thing’s for sure: if you’re dating him you’ll be the envy of all you see.
With those three options, you really can’t go wrong picking out your Fiddler bachelor! I hope this highly important post has helped you discern whether you’re a Motel, Perchik, or Fyedka kinda girl.
What do you think? Which Fiddler bachelor is right for you? Let’s chat in the comments.
Dream: “Meeting a bookish girl and raising many bookish children together.”
I feel like this needs to be printed on T-shirts to be sold in the Thomas Aquinas College bookstore…
??? oh my gosh, I got such a kick out of this! I guess I’m mostly a Motel girl, but I wish I had the guts for a Fyedka. Lol!!!
What!?!? Why didn’t Lazar Wolf make the list of bachelors? Please update.
I laughed till I cried when I read this comment! I mean, you’ll never go hungry with Lazer Wolf!
Nah, wouldn’t be kosher. The daughter of a dairyman and the butcher? That has to be mixing meat and milk. No good.
Such a fun read. Now I want to go watch Fiddler on the Roof again. Motel is the one for me but Fydeka and his love of books makes it hard to choose.
Perchik all the way! The father/daughter mother/son dance at our wedding was to Sunrise, Sunset. Such a great movie. I’d be interested in what the write up on Tevya would look like . . .
Me, or my daughters? I would urge my daughters to choose Motel. Not sure if I would follow my own advice!
This! ?
Well, I married Perchik; Strong and passionate, however not very political. I have such a fondness for Motel and his unwavering, dedicated devotion to Tzeitel. And Fyedka… bookish Fyedka.
Actually, scratch my marrying Perchik. I think I married a piece of all these bachelors: strong and passionate; unwavering, dedicated devotion; and common sense, why not?, farmer/soldier man who dislikes injustice.
I totally married a Motel!! – the American, Catholic version. You know, the “altar boy next door” type.
He’s the best husband in the whole world. I totally recommend Motel to anyone out there looking.
I don’t understand why we’re not talking about Tevye.
Fiddler on the Roof is one of my favorites! My husband and I dressed up as Motel & Tzeitel our second Halloween together, and it’s quite perfect. He’s an artist, slim with a great beard, and loves the simple life.
Oh my goodness. This post is awesome!! That is all. ?
Love this! The Mister says, “False. The best one is the one who’s already taken (Tevye), because he knows everything things Good Book says.”
*the Good Book says.
I swear one of these days autocorrect will be the end of me.
Motel all the way!!!
But I also love Hodel and Perchik’s story.
Love ‘Sunrise, Sunset’ wedding scene!!!
Great movie and great idea for a post!!!!!!!
I totes have a Perchik, though I would have sworn I’d marry a Motel if you’d asked adolescent me. He’s outspoken and smart and opinionated and frequently makes a scene, “but here with my love, I’m home.”
I mean…Fyedka is delightful if you ignore the whole thing where marrying him means a) leaving behind your family and religion and b) being excommunicated by your family’s religion. A Jewish coworker and friend explained to me what marrying Fyedka actually means in the context of their faith (after explaining what terms her Jewish daughter is allowed to marry her Gentile boyfriend who is not converting to Judaism) and…it’s not so pretty and romantic. Fyedka is really the most rebellious choice in husband.
And what about the Rabbi’s son? Is he available?
“Our village only has one Rabbi. And the Rabbi only has one son!”
I saw the play in elementary school and Motel became my ideal man for years! But really, I’ve ended up with a Perchik/Fydeka combo and he’s becoming my Tevye. Fiddler is the best!
Bwahahaha!
“NOT because I’m hungry. I have enough food for myself AND Tzeitel. Cannot stress this enough.”
Love it.
Haha, this is great!
My husband and I are what would have happened if Perchik married a female Fyedka.
He’s the social justice-minded-one who has thus far dragged me to 6 states in 10 years of marriage pursuing his pastoral and then nonprofit-development careers.
I’m the bookish one of a different faith background than he was (Catholic). He ended up converting to the Catholic Church though, so I guess that’s a trade-off for all the moves
And of course we have a bunch of bookish children.
Perchik for the win!
This is one of the greatest posts! Can I have a little bit of each of them, and make my future husband? I would choose Motel, add the intellectual and dancer of Perchik. And the “a pleasant fellow, charming, honest, ambitious, quite bright, and very modest. Also, kind of a babe.” and love for books of Feydya.
I’ve always loved Perchik.. but common sense leads me to Fyedka.. I mean… Communism isn’t exactly the best match for a Catholic
I just watched this for the first time woth my kids a few weeks ago, and I’m #TeamMotel allllllll the way. I married a Perchik/Fydeka combo, and he’s turned into a Tevye over the years