This Week’s Miscellany: (Pig Edition) Vol. 63

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On the Homestead:

Oh ho ho, do I have a story for you! The other night after the kids went to bed, Daniel and I watched a crime/detective show full of suspense and creepiness. Just as it was over, there was a knock at the door (around 9:30pm) and I could see it was a car we didn’t recognize. Because I’m generally a paranoid weirdo and I had just been terrified by the crime show, my first reaction was “don’t answer it!” But since Daniel is not a complete loony, he did answer it. (Knowing that he was shirtless and still wearing the bicycle shorts he rode home in makes the story better so make a mental note of his attire.)

So, he opens the door and the woman on our doorstep says, “Hi! Do you have pigs?” (We don’t.) “Because there’s a little pig running around out here.” And indeed, across the street there was a little black piggy snorting and trotting about. “I guess I just figured it was yours,” she continued, “because….” (gestures around at our overgrown front yard vegetable garden and chickens). Then apparently she considered her job complete having alerted the neighborhood weirdos that there was a pig running amock.

Daniel, being the “take-charge of the situation” sort of fellow that he is (and still wearing only bicycle shorts) runs across the road for the pig, catches it, and carries to our shed. If you’ve never heard a pig squeal, imagine how loud you think it would be and then multiply that by 2038. SO LOUD. IN THE DARK. BEING CARRIED BY A MAN WEARING ONLY BICYCLE SHORTS. The little piggy runs into the shed, Daniel closes the door, and then laughs harder than I have ever seen him laugh.

Animal Control’s after hours hotline goes straight to the Police station which wasn’t terribly concerned that a little lost pot-bellied pig was in our shed, so they told us to just keep it overnight. Which meant the kids woke up to the news that we had a pig in our backyard. Talk about excited. Benjamin was so thrilled with the piggy that after months of refusing to work on writing letters (although he recognizes them all and knows what sounds they make) he made a sign that said “PIG IN SHED” quite legibly. OK, so it said “PIG IM SHED” and the “shed” wasn’t entirely legible, but what? Where did that come from? Note to other parents of preschoolers: If your child isn’t motivated to work on writing, just get a pot-bellied pig. Anyhow, the pig’s owner came by the next day to pick her up and we are invited to visit our new friend whenever we like. The End.

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The Quotable Lucy:

Benjamin: “Lucy and I aren’t that cute, but Baby Gwen sure is!
Lucy: “Hey! YES I AM!

The Quotable Benjamin:

The pig is soooo cute, Mama! She’s as cute as Baby Gwen!

Quote of the Week:

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Links:

The Case for Good Taste in Children’s Books: Imprimis

Why I Love the Necessary Cesarean: Better Than Eden

DIY Transition Boards: Mama and Baby Love (I think Benjamin needs something like this. Wish I were crafty enough to make one.)

How to Stop Hating Facebook: This Ain’t the Lyceum

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This is how excited I was about Gwen falling asleep early so I could have a girls night out with some friends while Daddy held down the fort at home. Because I hate pumping, outings without Gwen in tow are few and far between.

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The Florida heat is downright miserable in August. But I love where I live. North Florida is full of beauty.

And remember to enter the Shaklee giveaway to win some great B-Complex supplements! Today is the last day to enter as it closes at midnight tonight (Friday)! Be sure to check back tomorrow when I announce the winner (chosen by random number generator) because Angela has a special gift for all the Carrots readers.

Hope your weekend is wonderful and that we all have a hint of autumn in the air!

Love,

Haley

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Comments

  1. says

    “The pig is soooo cute, Mama! She’s as cute as Baby Gwen!”

    Kids say the funniest things! I miss when my cousins were young, because family reunions were always full of statements like that. I love how innocent and forthright kids can be.

  2. Rachel says

    All the way through the article on Children’s and Young Adult Literature, I was reminded of St. Paul Then didn’t the author finish up with him!
    Excellent. I’m in total agreement. What we read has a profound effect on us.
    BTW, in your earlier post which mentioned Mrs. Gaskell, Mary Barton was not included. It’s a fine read, I think.

    • Haley says

      I’ll have to read Mary Barton, Rachel! Thanks for the recommendation. And yes, I really liked that article about literature!

  3. Melissa H-K says

    This is making me laugh sooooooo hard! Cackle, even! Oh, man! ::giggles helplessly::

    I want to see the PIG IM SHED sign. How could you omit that?

    And I love love love Lucy’s quotations. She is amazing. So is Benjamin. Gwen is lagging. What the heck is wrong with that child? Why can’t she say funny things, too? Gee, that pig must have done something to her verbal skills. Fortunately, she is still a very pretty little muffin.

    :-D

      • Lois says

        Based on one weekend of indoor pig-sitting and a year of farming, I can safely say that having a pig friend you can go visit is much better than having your own pig! At least, when we’re talking about pet pigs…if a future of bacon is part of the equation, it may be different.

        The bicycle shorts do make the whole story much more hilarious.

  4. says

    Ha! Best late-night visitor ever. I was really hoping this story would end with “…and then we got to keep him,” but oh well. There’s always next year!

    • Haley says

      Well, my MIL was watching the kids while I went to the dentist when the owner came to pick up “Betty.” Apparently, she said we could keep the pig in front of the kids! Ahhh! Thankfully, they didn’t hear her and my wise MIL politely declined her offer, haha. I won’t lie…the thought of walking a pig and three kids around the neighborhood is adorable.

  5. says

    Little pig little pig! And my husband would totally have done the same thing, in probably the same attire. When we got engaged he had just retired a pair of sunflower running shorts that barely covered his more, er, manly parts. Everyone on campus liked to say that they had seen more of him than I had. ;)

    And pumping is the worst! I had to have my gallbladder out when my baby was 10 months old, and pumping every day for a week was not fun at allll.

    • Haley says

      Ha! Ugh, pumping! Sometimes I think…wouldn’t it be nice to go out without the baby and then I think…..eh, not worth it!

  6. says

    This is easily the funniest story I’ve ever seen on the blog. I like that some neighborhood woman thought the pig was yours (and I’m kind of jealous: how exciting!). Next it will be goats which, despite the words on goats in the Scriptures and their weird shaped pupils, are pretty cute too. :)

  7. Rachel S says

    Thanks for the link about the children’s literature! I used to work at a library and was a “teen liaison” which meant that I had to keep up with the Young Adult collection and do some teen events. I was always so ashamed of the books that we had on offer, I felt like a smut dealer!

  8. says

    We saw three little wild boars running along the side the road when we visited FL this past March; they are SO adorable.

    Great post and links! And Imprimis – be still my alumna heart! :)

  9. says

    Great story! I love stories of unexpected animals around the house (friendly ones, of course). Hopefully it wasn’t too hard to say goodbye when the pig had to go!
    I also like your hairband look. :)
    I came across that post about facebook as well and thought it was quite on point!

    • Haley says

      Oh, Deirdre. It was just too funny. The kids seemed consoled by the thought that they could go visit Betty anytime, haha.

  10. says

    Oh my goodness, my kids would LOVE to wake up to us unexpectedly pig-sitting! How fun! Glad you were able to get out for a bit and thank you so much for the link!

  11. Chrissy says

    Haha! I want a pig so badly! My neighbors would kill me. Cure for my 7-yr-old’s math anxieties: we did math with one of our chickens sitting in a box on the table. Seriously, it worked.

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