A Picture of the Incarnation on My Kitchen Floor

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During this pregnancy (my third) my mood swings have been unreal. One minute everything is rosy and the next I find myself sobbing for no reason. And if I wait too long to eat or don’t get enough sleep, I am sure to be an insane hysterical basket case.

The worst meltdown occurred for really no reason at all at about halfway through the pregnancy. We put the kids to bed, then Daniel ran some errands while I made treats for a friend’s baby shower. When he left, I was in my right mind. When he returned, he found me sobbing in the kitchen as I iced carrot cake cupcakes with cream cheese icing, my mascara running down my face.

What’s the matter?!” he asked as he walked over to put his arm around me.

Nothing, really!” I sobbed. “Except everything! I’m always tired and I’m always throwing up and and it’s so hard! I love my baby, but I feel so physically miserable and I can’t stop crying and I don’t know why!

Being the wise man that he is, he knew I was in no state to hear reason and nothing he could say would stop the crazy that was spewing from my mouth. So he just listened while I exploded with pregnant hysteria until I wore myself out and I sat down on the kitchen floor.

He took a deep breath, sat down with me, put his arms around me, and we leaned against the dishwasher while I sobbed my little pregnant heart out for several minutes. As the meltdown fizzled out and I stopped crying, I had an epiphany: my husband was an image of Christ right here on our hardwood floor. Instead of talking me down or telling me I was being ridiculous, he got down into the middle of my pregnant crazy meltdown, sat there, and shared it with me.

His love was a reminder that God’s great love prompted him to actually come down to us, share our humanity, and suffer in our stead. I know I am more than fortunate to be married to a man who lives out that love each day of our marriage.  

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Comments

  1. says

    Aww!
    God was so wise to ordain that a woman be protected and accompanied by a man through motherhood!
    What a good guy (your husband – I don’t usually refer to God that way).

  2. jami says

    I am so glad to hear I am not the only one that has crazy pregnancy moments. I swear some days I am dr. jeckyll and mr. hyde. Even I don’t know who I am going to be until the moment. Thank you for encouraging me this morning as I start my week. Also reminding how great my man is too. For often just holding me in those times. Have a great week and a baby this week!

  3. says

    I’m almost at the halfway mark with my third pregnancy and I feel the same way as you. Happy one minute, snapping the next, crying my eyes out for no reason in the next. Good for your husband for just letting you get it out!

  4. says

    Haley,

    This is incredible! I love it. I just started a blog last night based on the same ideas of all the people around us being Icons of Jesus. It is absolutely a perfect way to live. If you’d like to check it out, it is now at hopeforti.tumblr.com. Tomorrow, the conversion should be finished so it will just be at hopeforti.com.

    You’re inspiring! I love reading you! Happy birthing!

    Hope

  5. says

    I love this! It was just the reminder I needed this morning, because my husband is good at this sort of thing, too, and I often don’t appreciate it as much as I should! :-)

  6. RosalindaL says

    Beautiful reminder! Thank you so much for sharing :). God bless you always with peace and joy (and beautiful epiphanies)

  7. Melissa says

    That is just lovely! As I heard of somebody saying once, “My husband is my St. Joseph.” What a patient, kind man your husband is!

    • Haley says

      Yes! I am so often reminded of St. Joseph when I think about my husband. So grateful for a far better man than I deserve!

  8. says

    I haven’t been pregnant in nearly six years, and I still end up in tears on the kitchen floor if I don’t get enough sleep or wait too long to eat :) I’m glad you have such an amazing man to help you through (mine is pretty awesome too!)

    • Haley says

      Lack of sleep and low blood sugar is the lethal combo for me, too, even when I’m not pregnant! I can go from cheery to monster in a few seconds :)

  9. says

    So true. I’ve been there before, too. Recently. And I’m sure I will be there again. Soon :)

    I often wonder, “How do women with lousy husbands do this? Or even mediocre ones?” I am grateful that my husband is also a Christ-centered man who knows that it means to serve!

    Xo

    • Haley says

      Seriously! I think about single moms and wives of less thank helpful husbands all the time. How do they do it?! I can barely scrape by with the selfless husband I’ve got. My hat is off to women who have far greater challenges than I!

  10. Marta Pisco says

    I’m glad I read the all post. When I saw the tittle I though: “ok, now she lost it!”
    Ahah! Hold on in there, your brand new baby is almost in your arms! Much love for you and your family, have a great week!
    Marta

  11. says

    That is most beautiful thing I’ve ever read. I kinda cried sitting here at my desk at work. As one who has had a rough marriage…I thank God every day for providing such wonderful men for my friends and sisters. I’m so grateful that they don’t have to experience what I have. Cherish that brave man of God!

  12. Julie says

    This is one of the many wonderful things I love about your blog. It is humble and uplifting. You do not berate or emasculate your husband for the world to see like so many others. You love, respect and honor him. You see him for the man he is, one made in the image of Christ. I pray we may all be able to see our spouses in that light. Thank you for your words.

    • Haley says

      Thank you for this encouragement, Julie! I try to always ask him to read over anything involving him on the blog before I post it. We learn more about how to be married each year that passes and I’ve known from the beginning that I’m getting the better end of the deal by having such an amazing man leading our family.

  13. says

    I know just how you feel! I was rocked back on my heels when I realized this about my husband.

    I was upset over something he did or said (I don’t know what now). He’d apologized. I was still upset a few hours later. I shot him a look that said as much. He replied, “What? I said I am sorry.” I knew I wasn’t getting anymore from him. BUT insted of getting more mad I recalled, “Love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs”. i knew he was right. He really, truely apologized and I needed to accept ot & let go of my hurt…because I was keeping a record of worngs.

    Ironically, my non-believer husband was reminding me of what our Lord says about how o love. <3

  14. says

    Thank you for sharing this! I can relate very well!! This is my 8th pregnancy (although we lost three to miscarriage), which makes this my 5th pregnancy that I’ve carried this far along. All of my pregnancies have been difficult and filled with sickness, problems and anxieties for various reasons. However, this has been the most difficult and I’ve had meltdowns like yours on many occasions. Thank God for my husband because he has been such a huge support to me when I just fall apart crying for no apart reason or because I’m at the end of my rope. It is a comfort to hear that other women have gone through the same thing!

    • Haley says

      Oh girl. Had a meltdown this morning. Pregnancy is hard and we are so lucky to have supportive husbands!

  15. says

    Oh, my–I am newly pregnant with my third (almost out of the first trimester…), and I can relate with that moment completely. Praise God for husbands who give us grace and simple hugs when we most need them! That’s been one of the joys of being pregnant for the third time, really–my husband is a pro at patient listening now, and those beautiful demonstrations of Christ :)

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